Slow.

Slow. Slowing down? Not a bad idea. Even possibly stopping. I think the writing is suffering. It all feels quite terrible lately.  I don't know. It's not that. And I write a little everyday. Cold turkey? That would be like pointlessly cutting off a pinky. I'm not stopping. The problem?  I've entered into a couple workshop situations and... yeah comparing my work to others. "Don't do it!" Comparing yourself to others will only mess you up. All I really wanted was feedback. Instead I'm terribly conflicted and feeling backwards about the indirect criticism of other writers. Don't get me wrong, the direct feedback has been positive. But I've always seen this as an art form rather than a set writing form. According to some lack of structure = unprofessional, amateurish. Which I never listened to my teachers about form or subject matter. However, it is quite different when it comes from other writers, especially when some are elitist. Generally when I present the stories to my family, friends or other non-writers they are well received and... I'm not finishing that thought. This will pass. I think about quitting all the time. Yet I do not. The experience has been educational. Do I recommend it? Hmm. Ask me later. Alright! I'll concede there is more to it... in addition to my ever changing life, an opportunity to write a script has presented itself.  Someone has an idea and they want me, of all people, to bring it to life. It overwhelms me and changes everything else, but it must go onto the back burner... Slowing down to a set pace will help me reach that project sooner. Anyhow for everything else, give me a glass of Merlot, a hot shower, and 24 hours. m.

*despite the down undertone of this one I'm keeping it. With all crafts you have good moments and bad moments. How you persevere is what matters. This was a bad moment. Anyhow, I had a talk with someone @ 3am and was told 'now that you've allowed yourself to be upset... let it be. you don't have to take all of the criticism to heart. it isn't personal. it is the work they are evaluating not you. you want to get better, this is part of the territory.' so I'm not slowing down, but steadying my pace and with the good will come the bad.