Saturday, April 24, 2010

Blame.

Blame.


Blame. Finally getting back to the place you started. Facing the person in the mirror who really created the havoc. Pointing the finger where it belongs, and then letting yourself off the hook.

Even as a child it’s easier to finger someone else for an awful misdeed. Standing there silently watching while Sally James gets punished, instead of me. A harsh slap to the face from her cross mother. For throwing the cat into a washing tub to see if it would swim. Poor kitty. She could swim, but the soap residue didn’t seem to agree with her coat. Hairless. Little pieces of kitty fur floating along in the tub. My own feelings of guilt couldn’t stop me from blaming someone else.

Blaming me for the wrong things was like an uncontrollable addiction. Blaming you was easier than accepting responsibility for my own immature actions. Especially when I set the couch on fire doused with your favorite cologne in retaliation. And shredding her clothes with an electric knife. You really should have changed those locks. Not that it would have stopped me. A blow for a blow.

Blaming others is another way of lying. You can’t go on lying to yourself. It won’t do any good. That ex and the demise of the relationship isn’t the reason you are unhappy. Blaming him won’t bring back the happiness. Accepting that there’s a part of you that’s responsible will liberate those feelings. Recalling the memories of the end. The endless hours spent screaming obscenities while breaking dishes. Arguments that can’t be won. Happiness is not attained through hostile accusations.

Winding up in the never-ending circle of blame. Witch hunting for a culprit when there isn’t one. Human nature dictates that anger precedes any well wishing. That’s no excuse. That poor girl shouldn’t have been caught in the middle. But she shouldn’t have blamed me for your shortcomings either. The golf clubs to my windshield were a nice surprise. What she’s done seals the deal. No boundaries. No telling what’s going to happen.

Reproach of others will only eat away at your mind. The grass is not greener on the other side. With a little nurturing your life can be just as beautiful. Facing the truth and holding yourself accountable for the misdeeds is the only sense of freedom. Recalling the moment of clarity and releasing the blame. No one left to blame.



400. Blame. Ever blame someone else for something you were at fault for? I think everyone has at some point. It’s a life lesson. Most important part is learning not to do it. This came from a song and a tangent. hehe. Right now... There's nothing and no one to blame for anything. 

Where’s the room? I’m having technical difficulties and trying to work it out… graciously with a SMILE! Hopefully tomorrow I can upload it. Didn’t want to hold back both stories over nothing. It’s just a picture. It’ll be up when it can. For now, Enjoy! m.

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