de da da da
Don't think me unkind
Words are hard to find.
They're only cheques I've left unsigned
From the banks of chaos in my mind.
And when their eloquence escapes me
Their logic ties me up and rapes me.
De do do do de da da da – The Police
I feel like this right now, as I don’t have the right words for anything. The Police are quite the sound for my day. I’ve been digging it since 2 am.
“Lucy, you got some 'splainin' to do!”
And I do. But like there really are no words to say I’m not myself since I’ve been back. I've been crazier. I'm sorry. I'm not that kind of lady and don't aspire to be. The writing is new territory. Unlike anything I've undertaken before.
WOW! I went there on that last one. It was intense for me. Coming back is kind of hard to do. If you need a map or an explanation, ok. I had to get into that emotional state to put it down. This is new territory for the writing. I've never... and I needed desperately to see it from both sides to understand the mental anguish in the situation. I doubt I did it justice on paper either. It’s another story that I will be revisiting when I’m ready. My apologies if it was too dark or if someone out there is in anyway offended. Please don’t be. This idea sprang out of mind head and I ran with it, knowing full well... where it was headed. I’ve actually got a lot of people questioning me about the darkness of my writing. There’s no real explanation right now except this is what I’m doing. I can see the stories in my mind.
Bad news came to someone dear to me. And I can’t do a thing to change the circumstances for them. It shouldn’t be this hard for them. Anyhow the world, as they know it, is about to turn upside down for the first time in about 4-5 years. All good things must come to an end someday. One chapter has to end for a new one to begin.
“So you know exactly when your world will come crashing down. There’s no escape. You just make the best of the time that’s left and ENJOY it.” m..
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